How To Enjoy Your Own Company and Love Yourself More

After struggling with hormonal ups and downs as a teenager, and an episode of depression when I was 19 after a breakup, I decided to study and cultivate more self-love. The ultimate goal; to learn how to enjoy my own company and love myself more.

I studied and read books like You Can Health Your Life, by Louise Hay (I read that one cover to cover until it was falling apart!). I wrote affirmations daily and did mirror work. I wrote in a gratitudes journal, I meditated, I tapped (EFT), I did breathwork…

I even studied yoga in India and met with the Dalai Lama in my 20s (and then wore a bindi on my head for the next 6 months). I’m not kidding!

I thought I had nailed self-love. I thought I truly understood what self-love was and I was always going to be happy.

I was wrong.

I had a long way to go to be able to enjoy my own company and love myself more.

You see, when I was younger, I loved socialising and being surrounded by lots, and lots of people. It didn't matter whether it was a party with friends or a club night with hardly anyone I knew.

I was in my element.

I loved the music, the dancing, the buzz, the dressing up, the conversations, the drinking, the buzz from that too.

ALL of it.

I was often described as "the life of the party" and I avoided time on my own as much as I could.

My excuse? I was an extrovert and I gained energy and joy from being with people.

That was, until I didn't.

It's not that I suddenly didn't enjoy being around people anymore (I still love nothing more than a walk with a friend or a lunch with a close group of girlfriends). It's that I finally understood that people didn’t need to like me, or approve of me, for me to be whole and happy.

If a social engagement was going to leave me feeling drained, I didn’t need to go.

It was okay to get joy from deep internal connection and from leading a more spiritual life.

It wouldn't have mattered how sick I was in the past, if I missed a social event I would get FOMO (fear of missing out). I would check my social media feed incessantly, wishing soooooo much that I could be THERE.

When I started to practice consciously choosing myself over others, over damaging situations, over unfulfilling friendships and relationships, things started to change.

This created space for me to be kind and compassionate with myself. I was choosing self-love instead.

I was reminded of how much I have changed recently when I picked up a nasty tummy bug that left me feeling depleted, in pain - and on the toilet a lot!!

During this 7 week period my body was crying out for more rest and sleep to help me recuperate and repair. I had no choice but to slow down and do less.

I started going to bed earlier and meditating more with guided practices on my favourite ap Insight Timer.

This time spent turning inwards, reminded me of how much I now love my own company.

These days I love nothing more than getting my zen on, and indulging in some cosy, totally-deserved and incredibly nourishing self-care... (a long bath or infrared sauna with a book is one of my mojo-filled favs!).

I now truly appreciate the opportunities I get to reconnect with myself, my body, mind, spirit, and soul.

This is what truly fills up my self-love cup...

As it's a new month I've been setting new intentions around self-care. My main intention for this month is:

I create the space I need, when I need it, and I feel empowered to absorb all the goodness I need from rest and nourishing self-care.

I'd love to know how you replenish yourself? Hit reply and let me know below :)

If you’re looking to improve your self-worth and why not try our our 7 Day Mindfulness Experience.